Contribution
I beg to move,
That this House has considered the recognition of humanist marriages.
It is an honour to serve under your chairship, Dame Siobhain. I start by declaring an interest as a member of the all-party parliamentary humanist group, to which Humanists UK provides the secretariat. Many Members present are also members of the APPG.
Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to witness the joining of the hon. Member for Tamworth, my hon. Friend the Member for Morecambe and Lunesdale (Lizzi Collinge) and the hon. Member for Henley and Thame (Freddie van Mierlo), who jointly requested this debate to discuss our wish to see humanist marriages made legal throughout the UK. We are grateful to the Backbench Business Committee for granting this important debate.
Humanists UK trains and accredits celebrants who, just this morning, will probably have conducted at least four weddings and a funeral. I pay tribute to such celebrants, one of whom conducted my grandmother’s funeral, but this debate is about humanist marriage. Why? Because despite conducting tens of thousands of ceremonies every year, including weddings, they are legally recognised in only some of the UK jurisdictions in which they operate, and are not legally recognised in England, Wales or the Isle of Man.
Humanist weddings are non-religious wedding ceremonies conducted by accredited humanist celebrants. Humanists UK defines humanists as non-religious people who rely on the scientific method to understand the universe. Humanists make ethical decisions based on reason, empathy and concern for others, and believe that meaning in life is something that we all discover for ourselves through seeking happiness and contributing to the wellbeing of others.
Humanist ceremonies are a manifestation of that philosophy—an expression of self-created meaning and shared happiness. Those ceremonies should be a profound reflection of the participants’ values and beliefs, their relationship, their families and friends, and their place in the world. Central to the ceremony is a focus entirely on the couple, ensuring that it is deeply personal, while remaining inclusive of all of those attending, irrespective of their diverse religious beliefs. Humanist weddings are a manifestation of the couple’s non-religious beliefs and identity, and they are built collaboratively with their loved ones to reflect all of their contributions.
It is rare for most non-religious people to express their beliefs publicly, and unlike religious people, there is no compulsion to attend a place of worship on a weekly basis. For those who choose to have a humanist wedding, it is an opportunity for a rare public expression of their beliefs, which makes their wedding feel all the more significant and makes it all the more tragic that such weddings are not legally recognised in England and Wales.
In creating such a ceremony, humanist celebrants can dedicate up to 40 hours—sometimes more—to working closely with the couple. That substantial time investment is focused on getting to know the couple so that the celebrant marrying them is not someone who they have just met on the day, but someone who they have a solid, personal relationship with. It is focused on a deep understanding of the couple, their shared values and their feelings for one another, enabling the creation of a ceremony with enduring impact. It is more than the one-time commitment that can be associated with other forms of marriage solemnisation.
The location of the ceremony often holds particular significance as well. The focus is on finding the place that will be most meaningful, which could be where the couple met, where they fell in love or where they got engaged; it could be a garden, their local beach or where they go on holiday. For example, my hon. and learned Friend the Member for Folkestone and Hythe (Tony Vaughan) had a humanist wedding. His partner is Scottish, and he told me that they picked Scotland over England for their marriage partly for that reason, but also because they wanted the marriage to be legal. They got married in the highlands in a place of huge personal significance for them.
Humanist marriages have legal recognition in Scotland, Northern Ireland, Jersey, Ireland and Guernsey, but we have inequity within the UK because Wales and England remain the exception. The Welsh Government have long championed the change, but progress ultimately hinges on the UK Government’s willingness to act.
Humanist marriages have proved incredibly popular where they are legally recognised, with more humanist than religious marriages currently taking place in Scotland. The number of such weddings in Ireland and Northern Ireland has also grown enormously, but in England, the lack of legal recognition suppresses the huge demand.