Emily Darlington

Every woman has a story and every woman knows how to carry her keys as a weapon. Any other extremism and murder on this scale would be front-page news every single day, but what we see instead is language like “incels” and “red pill”, which hides what is actually going on with our young men and boys. I am thinking of people like Andrew Tate, who very openly says: “If you put yourself in a position to be raped, you must bear some responsibility.” In a video viewed 1.6 million times, he discusses how you should fight a woman, saying that you should “grip her up by the neck.” Eight out of 10 boys aged between 16 and 18 have read, listened to or watched Andrew Tate, and they have a positive view of him. They think that he wants them “to be real men” and that “he gives good advice”. This is the core of the issue. Some people will say that this has always been the issue. It has, yes, but not at this scale. Young men’s attitudes are more misogynistic and violent than their elders’. Only half of young men between 18 and 24 recognise that rape can still happen if the victim does not resist or fight back. Less than half of them think that if a man has been drinking or taking drugs, then he is still responsible if he rapes someone. If someone says they want to meet online, most young men think that they deserve sex as a result. Yes, our 16 days of activism starts with men, but it is also for men’s sake—because this toxic masculinity is causing problems across our society—and for the lives of our women and girls.