Contribution
It is a pleasure to serve with you in the Chair, Mrs Hobhouse. I congratulate the hon. Member for Bishop Auckland (Sam Rushworth) on introducing this really important debate.
There is a contradiction between the widely shared agreement, certainly in this Chamber, about the vital importance of a positive male role model in shaping young lives and the lack of support, services and policy to support that. But let me say something equally important at the outset: a child does not need a father in the house to flourish. Children raised by single mothers, two mothers, grandmothers or kinship carers are not children with something missing. I represent many such families, and we have heard powerful testimony about them today. They do an extraordinary job, often with less support than they deserve.
Children benefit from care, stability and good examples of how to be in the world. It matters whether every child has adults around them modelling something worth copying, but a good role model must first be a present one, and presence is a question not simply of character but of how we structure our society. If we want fathers to be there in the earliest weeks and years, we have to build a society that fosters that through policies, including paternity leave.
The evidence on why this matters is strong. Research led by the University of Leeds found that children whose fathers regularly drew, played and read with them at age three did better at school by age five, and that fathers’ involvement at five improved key stage assessment scores at age seven. That effect held regardless of the child’s gender, ethnicity, age in the school year or household income.
We know that couples separate. For separating couples, we can reduce conflict with better early support, perhaps via family hubs. On the Women and Equalities Committee, we have examined the impact of paternity and shared parental leave. We recommended raising paternity pay to the level of maternity pay for the first six weeks—90% of average earnings—and setting out a pathway to six weeks of paid statutory paternity leave over this Parliament. Unfortunately, the Government did not commit to taking up that recommendation.
Last year, the Committee visited Iceland, where we had the opportunity to learn from and hear about one of the most progressive parental leave policies in the world. Iceland’s parental leave is framed explicitly around ensuring that children can receive care from both parents—or carers—and enabling women and men to combine family life with work. It is grounded in gender equality and children’s rights. Countries that provide fathers and co-parents with substantial, well-paid leave generally have better gender pay gaps—around four percentage points smaller than those that offer less than six weeks of leave. Increasing women’s workforce participation and earnings while reducing pay inequality should be a long-term priority, and it goes hand in hand with providing good male role models. I wonder whether, if that phrase was less awkward to say, we would talk about it more.
Role modelling does not stop at the front door. Only around 24% of teachers in England are men; in primary schools it is 14%, while in early years it is only 3%. Those are professions built around care, patience and emotional literacy, and we have allowed them to become, in practice, “women’s work”. That says something to every child at school: it teaches boys that caring is not for them, and it means that the children who most need a steady male adult in their lives are even less likely to find one. Patriarchal values upheld by society have taught boys that care is weakness, that what is associated with women or femininity is worth less, and that asking for help is failure.
Before I came to this place, I worked in a domestic abuse refuge. I saw what happens when the male role model in a child’s life is a violent one. Many children in the refuge had witnessed violence at home, usually directed by a father or partner against their mother. That is role modelling, too. To prevent the trauma from those circumstances affecting the next generation, we need to ensure that young boys in particular have at least one stable, secure, positive male role model in their life, and we need to enable a system that keeps children safe from violence in the home.
As a society, we have spent over a century examining what it means to be a woman. We have barely begun the equivalent conversation about being a man, so others have stepped in with a much uglier answer. We tell girls that feelings are okay and that it is good to talk, but we tell boys the opposite: that strength is silence and the only acceptable emotion is anger. Talking is “what girls do”, and what girls do is weak, so when a boy has a question he is too embarrassed to ask his dad, he does not ask anyone; instead, he types it into a search bar. Movember’s research, which surveyed more than 3,000 young men, found that nearly two thirds of them regularly engaged with men and masculinity influencers, and those who did reported worse mental health, less willingness to prioritise their mental health, and higher rates of risk-taking behaviour such as steroid use.
We have also, as a society, grown accustomed to male violence—in pornography, on television, in the street. That content, which is a feature of the manosphere, is landing because it offers men and boys a story about themselves. One in 10 girls aged 11 to 16 have missed or avoided school to escape sexual harassment, and that is more likely still for girls who are neurodivergent, disabled or LGBTQ+. The manosphere results in worse outcomes for everyone. When we build a country where men can be present, caring and visible in the home, nursery, classroom and youth club, we give boys something better to become, and as a result, we all gain.